Korean Store Poem by Dave Chappelle.




One night at 3am I went to the corner store
I forgot why
Oh, that’s right! I wanted a bite
I had the munchies because I was high


The store is owned by Mr. Fong
And every day he sees me, he does me wrong
He’s Korean and I’d never say that I hate all Korean people
I haven’t met all Korean people, that hate talk’s for savages
But even though I don’t generalize, I do do percentages and averages
So far I hate 1 out of 5 Korean people I’ve met so far


So I come in the store, “Hello Mr. Fong,” I say
And he just scowls at me and growls at me
“Buy something…hurry up”
Now look, I’m not stealing in the least
But if you’re shopping and you know someone’s watching you shop
That shit’ll make you look like a thief


Mr. Fong said, “Hey! I’ve been watching you since you came in the door
Buy something now or get out of my store!”
Now I couldn’t take it anymore
“Hey! Hey!” I said, raising my hand
“Get your fingers out of my face, China man!”
Mr. Fong said, “Hey! Hey! What make you think I’m Chinese?
You must not know what you’re saying!
You made a mistake brack man, Mr. Fong is Korean!”


Now, I was wrong. I was wrong
I said, “Uh, Mr. Fong, I’m sorry to offend by mistaking your race
But you gotta admit if it was a Chinese look-alike contest, your ass would place!
You’re a dead ringer for a Chinese
But don’t be mad at me, I didn’t mean to offend you in the least
You know some people say all black people look alike
We call those people police.


Thanks for reading.

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Tank driving, cheeky amazon from Warri Kingdom. Copywriter by day, blogger by night, foodie round the clock.

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